if you want to think that way.. fine.
then theres nothing i can do.
you called. but it didnt make me feel better.
in fact. it was worse. i felt worse.
i just wanted you to do well.
get to NA. have good future. won't get looked down on.
people won't think bad of you.
but this was what i got. a break up?
yea.. the blogskin did come in handy.
but. you won't change what. you just want to do it your way. then FINE. okay. do it your way.
when you get ur results. i won't get involve. i will just sit// stand and mind my own business. i know THAT GIRL will say all those things about me getting dumped and stuff. but well .all i can say is i tried my best. okay.
i did what i could. the rest is up to you. thats all i cansay.
for the rest of you who have no clue whats going on..
don't get involve. i don't want anymore people in the circle.
it's complicated. it's vexing. it's tiring. it's plain saddening.


back to the maths paper today.
it's was tough. and to make things worst.
my mind was in a mess.
`him. ` the mess. ` what happened. ` the qns.
i hand was trembling. hard.
nothing will change the paper.
i was so scared... i bit my finger.. the skin part..
and guess what?! the mark is still there.
red. and the heart. well. it's broken.
and even though he is talking to me on msn.
it's not helping. i am just a zombie like creature.

hiash.
you say you will not do stupid things to hurt me.. you promise.
but. what if it happens again.
what if what if...

-pEixiN
you hurt me too deeply.